Ten random updates and non-updates.
- Ri is down with a fever again. I’m re-reading my post on Fever Fighting to re-educate and re-assure myself. Also came across this useful article which every new fever-fighting parent must read. Do read the part about not combining cough medication and fever-reducers. Also, add a few drops of Eau-de-cologne to the water used to sponge feverish baby. The overall effect is a bit jazzy but adds fragrance to the otherwise dull proceedings.
- The playgroup thing is not really working out as well as I thought it would. It’s been more than a month since she joined and between fevers and allergies, her school-going is pretty erratic. Well, she pretty much hates the experience on the days that she actually goes. She comes back sore-throated, tear-faced and hicuppy. I think she may have benefited more from one of them ‘Mom & Me’ programs.
RD is very unhappy with the whole arrangement and we have some serious re-thinking to do on this front. Ri is such a spirited, outgoing and bright kid that I thought she would settle into school with minimal resistance. Well, as mothers most often discover, everyday is a new experience and lesson. Her playgroup teacher informs me that she does not open her mouth in class, cries in regular intervals, demands to be carried and refuses to eat with the other children. She is kind and reassuring but it is hard for any of us at home to have a metal image of a sad and withdrawn Ri. - Ri loves Amul Butter. She daintily eats it by herself with a spoon. We buy the individual airline packs of Amul, which is a blessing for adults as well. Come on, when faced with a crispy toast and a whole slab of Amul butter, only the lactose-intolerant and vegans among us can slap on the butter in moderation. When you buy the airline pack, you actually control the amount of butter you consume.
Being a vegetarian kid ( I have not started her yet on eggs as well), I allow her, her butter fix. As a habit, she drinks only regular toned milk as opposed to the full-fat version she should be consuming at her age. All these factors have helped me make peace with her airline pack butter obsession. While writing about this, I came across this great advertisement for Amul’s airline pack. Amul has always had some of the best advertisements in India! - I have a new wardrobe management solution (WMS) for Ri. One which gives all her clothes a fair chance to be worn. For more news on WMS, watch this space.
- The happiness I derive when I see neatly folded clothes, organised wardrobes and filed papers is indescribable. I most definitely inherit these traits from my mother. You know you have an OCD when you use your daughter’s gift coupons to buy yourself a giant book on Storage.
- Ri’s uncle is coming down next week from America. I cannot wait to see his reaction when he sees 22-month Ri. He last saw her when she was barely 2 months old. I’m sure they are going to have a great time together.
- I’ve already begun planning her second birthday party in my head. Ri to me is like how Amul Butter airline pack is to her. She is my biggest weakness and I don’t know how to ‘play it cool’ when it comes to her.
- There are some amazing things I discover about the mom-in-me everyday. This morning, around 3.00 am, I woke up with a start to discover Ri with a blazing temperature, whimpering softly. I jumped up like my body had received an invisible caffeine kick and within minutes, I had the whole fever routine covered: administered medicines, given sponge bath, changed diaper, fed her water, put on a fresh set of night-clothes etc. Pre-Ri, if I had to wake up that early, I would have pressed the snooze button on the alarm a million times and woken up barely able to function and bleary-eyed.
- I often wonder how mothers who have more than one child, do what they do? How do you manage a toddler and a baby?
When your heart is ready to burst with love for one child, how do you efficiently carve the space for one more? Not only in your hearts, you make space in your sore arms, aching hips and tired ears. How do you create space everywhere for one more? - While watching this season of Grey’s Anatomy, I was choking with tears over Meredith’s predicament with her child. I was deeply struck by the last line of that episode, the one where she says:
"You think that true love
is the only thing that can crush your heart..The thing that will take your life
and light it up...
Or destroy it.
Then you become a mother."
Hi Ri mom , nice blog chronicling a mothers journey .... went through the fever moments recently . i was amazed at how i could read his temperature mid sleep and jump for the sponge and crocin. they are so vulnerable . dealing with the questions was more difficult . what did u do?? i did nothing a virus came up on him ! which play school does ri go to. i am contemplating one next year. but this mom& me stuff i am not really sure off. I spend most of his waking moments together so it will be nice he spent some time with other kids .
ReplyDeleteDear Ri's Mom
ReplyDeleteHugs for when the li'l one is ill, making you all worried. A raging fever can really get both mom and child all worked up :-(
Loved your Point No. 9. Sounds like sheer poetry. And I'm with you on that one. I don't understand how moms of two kids manage...really! Hats off to them.
On Point 2. -- It's ok, don't panic yet. It's only been a month. It's a hard-to-accept but true fact that most kids do fall ill often soon after they start playschool/school -- whichever is their first experience of being among a group of kids. All moms will vouch for it. Depending on your kid's immunity (again depending on age too), the "phase" continues for some time. My Sonny was sick through most of his first year at the playhome. I know that won't be too reassuring to hear at this time. All I'm saying is, it happens. Just keep an eye and make sure she's otherwise happy. She'll take over three months perhaps to settle into a non-crying routine at the play group. It must be scary for them to be amidst so many new people at once. As much as our heart breaks into bits, this "settling in" phase must be borne with.
But if she continues to be really unhappy even after this, try talking to the teacher, try figuring out if there's any one thing that makes her unhappy. Worst case scenario, you can shift her out to a smaller place if she's still uncomfy-- somewhere where she'll get more attention and won't have to share it with many other kids...
All the best and don't worry