Random Ri List: Updates and the like

1. Ri fell off the bed again. A mother's worst nightmare. Ok, one of  many nightmares.
2. She keeps asking for her father who is travelling. 'Appa endhai'? she asks sweetly in Tamil. 'America', I respond, never really sure how to pronounce it right though I lived there for four years
3. Now RD has two pissed off women to contend with every time he travels. One who cannot pronounce America. Or, conscientious or sophisticated. Well, that's fodder for another post.
4. Ri's fever was followed by a mild rash, apparently one of the by-products of her viral fever. There! That's something I did not contend with when I wrote my grand post on fever management. The big guy up there was probably laughing at me when I pressed the 'publish' button and thought
   "So you think you know everything do you"?
5. Ri and I visited two close girlfriends from school who both have newborns. Ri seemed really big and mature next to them and I suddenly felt like she was growing up too fast. While one of them discussed a first month milestone, I panicked within. I don't remember what Ri was doing in the first month! When did she first smile? When did her eyes learn to focus?
6. Ri talks a lot for her age. Her voice and tone modulation is amazing.
7. I wish I spent more time teaching her 'clever' things but other people seem to be doing that. Instead, I teach her funny words in Tamil and how to walk like a model across the room.
8. Ri's idea of 'modelling' is to cross her hands at her back, bend her shoulders and strut, much like a old man thinking pensively.
9. When I last visited Dr. S., she mentioned that a little boy had very a high IQ and I felt mildly insecure. I know Ri is perceptive and intelligent but it wouldn't hurt to hear it validated by Dr.S.
10. I have a strange feeling that Ri saying 'podi' has something to do with me.

Random Ri List: Fever fighting and other stories

Spock's famous words to mothers are ' You know more than you think you do'. Well, when left to our own instincts, we certainly do but sometimes we do otherwise.
Ri battled a week-long cold and cough. When I took her over to her paediatrician, Dr.S, she recommended some basic medicines to make her feel more comfortable, a course that ran till Saturday. Now, this course did not include an antibiotic since the doctor felt she was progressing well without it.

Ri was fine on Sunday and Monday and I was happy that she had recovered.
On Tuesday morning, she has a funny cough that I did not have a good feeling about. Following my instincts, I called Dr S and reported it. She told me to start her on an antibiotic and prescribed the same over the phone.

After that phone call, Ri lost the funny cough and I decided not to go ahead with the antibiotic.
Well,  the child seemed normal and I felt that I should not medicate her unnecessarily.



By Thursday afternoon, the 'funny cough' manifested into a full-blown fever. I wished desperately that I had followed my own instincts and the ped's recommendation!

The fever shot up to very high temperatures and as any mom confronted with a blazing hot forehead and an ominous thermometer reading, I was anxious and nervous. It is only natural to keep asking yourself the question "Am I doing enough to protect my child during this illness"?

Reading the chapter on 'Fever Management' in Dr Sears 'The Baby Book' was an eye-opener and helped me stay calm even during times the fever spiked to a 104 degrees.

Here are a couple of things I learnt over the course of Ri's illness.

1. Stay calm. Children need calm mothers who must control flustered fathers :)
2. Educate yourself about your child's fever. Fever is not an independent dangerous condition that your child has. It is a normal and healthy response of the body to an illness. The body's immune system releases chemicals that raise the body temperature. This is part of the normal infection-fighting process (Sears)
3. Look at the glass half-full. Temperature spikes indicate that your child's anti-bodies have begun the process of fighting the underlying infection. Looking at the glass half-full, it is a positive sign that the body's 'good' soldiers have begun the battle against the  'bad' viruses. That being said, you cannot wait and watch the ongoing battle as your child's body heats up! Manage the body temperature with the medication prescribed by your ped.
4. Do not try to treat the fever over the phone. Though colds, coughs and fevers are common in children, it is always better to take them to the paediatrician and receive a written prescription. The process where the paediatrician examines the chest with a stethoscope to detect congestion in the lungs is important and you cannot do it at home unless you are a medical practitioner.
5. Respect your doctor's prescription! Stick to what your paediatrician has told you. You cannot give your child the paediatrician's medicine in the morning, your mother's recommendation in the afternoon and your grand-mother's 'vaidhyam' in the night.
6. Antibiotics are not evil. If your doctor recommends an antibiotic, Give it! No one hands out prizes to mothers who allow their children to fight illnesses naturally. If a registered medical professional thinks your child needs an antibiotic, he/she probably does. 
7. Share the prescription. Educate your spouse and/or fellow care-giver on what course of treatment you are going to follow. Share your findings, thoughts and intuitions with the father.
8. Treat your paediatrician fairly. Before you call your ped at unearthly hours, take a deep breath and understand why you are making the call. Are you asking a question to which you know already know the answer? Does your query warrant a phone call or is it better to wait till the next day and take the child in person. Give the ped-recommended medicines at least 3 doses to work before you decide the person is incompetent and run to the next ped in the block.
9. Treat your child fairly. On the other hand, do not let misplaced nervousness about calling the ped, get in the way of your child's health. For instance, if your child's temperature has spiked to a 104 degrees and is not controlled by regular paracetamol, you need to call and find out what to do to keep the child safe through the night. If you are confused about dosages, there is no harm in clarifying the same. Be clear about your baby's name, age and weight on the phone. You cannot expect your paediatrician to know your baby's medical history by heart.
10. So what thermometer are you going to use? Sears recommends the good ol' glass thermometer, Spock swears by the digital. Dr S. recommends the digital one and asks me to add 1 degree to an under-the-arm reading. They all do not recommend the newer, fancier ear thermometer. Apparently, the readings are not reliable. Make sure you speak with your paediatrician about what to use and how to take a reading.
11. Sponge regularly. Children facing an illness are bound to be irritable and not open to sponging. Bite your teeth through the tears and give them a sponge-bath. This is effective in lowering the body temperature.
12. Do not obsess over the temperature. Well, easier said than done. I am inclined to believe that mothers share a unique and similar relationship with their child's thermometers and their weighing scales. You know you are not supposed to look at both too frequently and obsess over the results, but you go right ahead and still do. Dr.Sears explains that is important to note the child's overall behavior. Is he/she active? Interested in playing? Does the child look faint? All these factors are also important in determining the child's well-being. Do not focus only on the temperature, focus on the child.
13. Maintain a fever record. Jot down your baby's temperature in regular intervals (4-6 hours) and what medicine you have given when. This will give you a good idea on the pattern the fever is taking and the effect of the medicine on the same.
14. Accept changes in schedule. Sleeping and eating patterns will change and children tend to have very poor appetites during illnesses. It is completely ok if your child is not getting his/her fair share of vegetables or proteins. Make sure your child eats a bare minimum of something just so that the medicines are not given on an empty stomach. 
15. Make space for a small treat. If your cranky child wants a few sips of a fizzy drink or suck on a lolly pop, this is not the time to discipline them about aerated drinks or candy.  A small supervised treat will be a welcome change for the child.
16. Keep the child fresh and clean. Most peds do not recommend regular baths when the child has fever. Baby wipes, baby cologne and powder help in keeping baby feel fresh.
17. Read the medicine packaging. I recently discovered ( thanks to a good friend and a great mom) that Crocin Syrup comes in two variations, 'Regular' and 'DS(Double Strong)' with the latter mentioning DS in small print in the label. I might have ended up giving Ri a double-dose of the prescribed medicine if she had not told me to look out for the same. Re-check the medicine strength, read labels and cross-check with prescription before giving it to your child.
18. Suppositories are simpler than you think they are. When confronted for the first time with the small piece of wax and my daughter's bottom, I did feel all hand-trembly. I broke the first one but successfully administered the second. If Yan can cook, so can you!
19. Keep your child hydrated. Water, juice, breast-milk. Ensure your child stays hydrated.
20. Give TLC. Children with fevers need a lot of TLC. So do mothers who fight fevers right?

P.S: My daughter is a 20 month old toddler and the information above is related to her age-group and not for infants and smaller babies.

Random Ri Find: Search Keywords

Dear Readers,
Blogger Stats can be addictive in a narcissistic-sort of way. Here are the search keywords that lead readers to this blog:

www.riddlemeri.blogspot,com

riddle me ri

summer time riddles

summertime riddles

a mother i cannot help but

one step at a time riddles

ceebeebies riddles

cheese riddles

gravy for pulao

hard riddle   ' a mother i cannot help but' amused me the most. Oops, hope that's not some karmic Internet message for me! Aren't some of them funny?   Love,   Ri's Mom

Ente Ri

Yesterday was Onam. The everyday newspaper came with an advertisement insert for Onam, prominently featuring an illustration of Mahabali, with his 'poonal' and pot-belly.

Ri pointed at Mahabali's belly and said' Thatha Thoppai'! (Grandpa's Belly).

My father has a prosperous midriff and on the auspicious day of Onam, his granddaughter compared him to the great Mahabali!

Happy Onam everyone!

All that I am. All that I ever was. Is there in your perfect eyes. They’re all I can see.

Dear Ri,

I turn 30 in 2 weeks and I used to have a whole list of things that I wanted to accomplish before that. Well, even you know me by now so we’re going to have to move some of those things (ok all off it) to what I want to do in my 30’th year:

So here goes 30 things that I want to do in my 30’th year:

1. Lose weight. Though I would love to say the politically correct line of ‘All I really want to do is get fitter’, I think I’m lying to myself. I don’t want to get fitter. I want to look better. Ha. There I said it!
2. Get into a Cleanse, Tone and Moisturize routine everyday. Yes! Inner beauty is more important and all that jazz but so is healthy, good skin.
3. Design, decorate and move in successfully into our new home. Have my OCD”s permeate gloriously into every bit of carpentry. I’m most excited about having individual draws for important folders.
4. Be a Domestic Goddess in that new home, the kind who has fresh flowers in her dining table, a cutesy to-do list on the fridge magnet and comes up with fun family dine-ins like Wok Wednesdays and Spaghetti Saturdays.
5. Buy my own small car and actually drive it!
6. Make your new room in the apartment bright and lovely and sparkly and fill it with all the wonderful things that you deserve.
7. Have you join a good playschool where you are happy and healthy!
8. Buy cookie-cutters and send you star and heart shaped sandwiches to school.
9. Begin to write a book.
10. Take-over your grandmother’s magazine and take it to a whole new level.
11. Update this blog with more sincerity
12. Begin to fill your baby book, the one where I’m supposed to stick your hospital bracelet and first lock of hair. I’m such a bad memory mom.
13. Go on a vacation alone with your father. I know it’s rather selfish to write this in a note to you but you know we’ll make it up to you somehow.  I really want my bum imprinted on a swimming pool lounge-chair somewhere and read a magazine on the flight!
14. Work for Google. I know it’s going to be hard with running a magazine, making star-shaped sandwiches and organizing Spaghetti Saturdays but one can try right?
15. Make my monthly column in a local community paper more frequent.
16. Start practicing yoga everyday. I truly love Yoga but wish I was more sincere about it.
17. Start writing down daily, monthly and yearly accounts.
18. Learn a foreign language. Not that I have a arty flair but I last heard that Mandarin is the way to go.
19. Practice Yoga with sincerity and dedication.
20. Attend a Brian Weiss therapeutic regression session. Your father has promised that this will be my 30’th birthday gift! A pass to one of his experiential workshops.
21. Walk on the treadmill everyday. I used to enjoy this but allowed my inner sloth to get the better of me. 
22. Be calmer, less distracted, a little less restless…..I find my inner conscience ROFL’ing at me as I type this.
23. Do something about my arms. God I hate them! As in, I love that I am an otherwise healthy person who has hands that work but I hate how they can bring my self-confidence to an all-time low.
24. Write for Readers Digest.
25. Read the Sat Charitra regularly. Re-attend my spiritual classes on Saturday.
26. Set aside more structured prayer and thanksgiving time for and with you. As this family’s mom-type-person, I feel I should be better about praying for you and daddy.
27. Be more careful and sensible while shopping for groceries.
28. Buy a new laptop. Keep the desktop clutter free.
29. Organize online and real photos better. Maintain neat albums of important occasions in your life.  
30. Strive everyday to be the mother that you deserve.

I turn 30 in 2 weeks and I used to have a whole list of things that I wanted to accomplish before that. Well, even you know me by now so we’re going to have to move some of those things (ok all off it) to what I want to do in my 30’th year. I look back at my life and remember high school and college and graduate school, I remember first love and heartbreak and projects and internships and graduations, my wedding, meeting your father, working, travelling and everything in between.

Yet, nothing in my 30 years feels as right as you do.

Blog Title: Snow Patrol – Chasing Cars

Random Ri List #2: You know you are travelling with a toddler when….

1. You spend most of your time in the hotel’s bathroom. And we’re not talking about bubble-baths here! Pass me the bottle brush will ya?
2. You try to make yoghurt in your hotel room because your toddler refuses to eat anything else. Does the fact that toddler did not eat room-brewed yoghurt ( sounds a bit ugh right but it’s not really that bad) count as a third point. Probably not. But, I had to mention it anyway.
3. Your eat ‘paruppu sadham’ for room-service dinner, leftovers from toddler. Do you know how much a resort charges for ‘paruppu sadham’ aka
   ‘daal chaaval’?
4. You allow toddler to drink Mirinda to avoid a scene in the airport. Exactly what a child who is already running around needs right?
5. Much to your relief, your child eats pureed banana for lunch. You pretend not to read the fine print that says ‘ Suitable for Sitter Stage’.
6. You pay the airline extra baggage to carry Fisher Price’s Froggy Seat? Fine let’s not mention the 120 matching hair-clips for toddler’s outfits.
7. You spend a mentionable portion of your vacation on the floor. You’re searching for the aforementioned hair-clips that your toddler insists on plucking out of hair in 2 seconds.
8. The books you longingly bought for your vacation came along for the free ride. Probably contributed to the damm excess baggage as well.
9. You take turns going for the buffet breakfast with your spouse. No point in changing todder’s morning routine.
10. No lounge-chair by the swimming pool has your bum imprint on it!

Random Ri List #1: You know you have a toddler when

You know you have a toddler when:

1. Lumps of cold uneaten food can actually bring tears to your eyes.
2. You feel like you are entering a battle-field when you mix a meal.
3. You think of pre-toddler convictions and laugh: Thou shall not scare your child about monsters in the basements......Hahahahaha
4. Vacations feel like high impact aerobic workouts.  
5. You can clean a dirty diaper, just about anywhere, with one hand at that! 
6. You wonder where you get your patience from or lack of thereafter.
7. Newborn babies make you weepy thinking of the months that flew by too fast.
8. You wonder if you'll cause your child orthopedic calamities with your oh-so-tight hugs.
9. You refer to your spouse as a 'Mommy' or 'Daddy' instead of their name: "So Daddy what are we doing today"?
10. Toddler babble is the highlight of your day, your week and your life......